


even when i lose i'm winning

by wintersend



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Baby Fluff, F/M, Oral Sex, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Tickling, four times jyn begs, i both hate and love this, two of these are fluffy one of them is smutty and the other is angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 21:21:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13644681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintersend/pseuds/wintersend
Summary: Jyn Erso doesn't beg. Except when she does.





	even when i lose i'm winning

**Author's Note:**

> hello, everyone! this is my first rebelcaptain fic so I'm a little nervous, especially because I'm a bit inexperienced with the SW universe and because there's also a bit of smut. I'm amazed at myself, it usually takes me longer to feel comfortable writing smut with a new ship but here we are. hope you enjoy!

**i.**

“Please,” Jyn sobs, not at all proud of how hoarse her voice sounds, and she swears she can actually _feel_ Cassian smirking against her leg.

She’s so wet and so over this push and pull, give and retreat teasing he’s doing. It was fun for the first hour or so – if a little frustrating – and she played along because she knew the results would be all the more rewarding. But it’s hard to remember that now, after the third time he built her up with his mouth, and the third time he pulled away right before she was going to come. If she doesn’t get her release soon, she’s going to –

She’s not sure what she’s going to do. Her ability to come up with coherent sentences has short circuited.

But Cassian gives her what she asked for, and though Jyn knows better than to think he’ll surrender so easily, she still shakes and moans uncontrollably as he kisses and licks and sucks at her clit. She arches her hips and closes her eyes, losing herself in the way his mouth feels on her. If she wills herself to come quickly, – and she really, really wants to – she can keep him from prolonging this torture any longer. Beat him at his own game.

But his kisses don’t last longer than a few seconds and he’s already pulling away. He looks up at her, dark eyes full of mischief and desire, and Jyn realizes he only meant to give her a taste of what he could do if she asked properly. He fully intends to make her beg first.

His smile just a little smug, he feigns ignorance and has the nerve to ask, “Please _what_ , Jyn?” as if he doesn’t already know. If her brain weren’t so hazy with lust, and her name didn’t sound so pretty on his lips in that moment, she might have punched him.

“Don’t stop, please. I want…” She takes a deep breath to steady herself. She’s beyond feeling embarrassed at this point but his fingers running in circles along her inner thigh are a little distracting. “I want to come.”

He hums as if contemplating. His face shows no visual reaction to her words but she _knows_ he’s pleased. It’s in the way his hand slides up her leg, closer to where she wants him.

“Come on, Cassian,” she continues, breathless, seeing an opportunity and seizing it. “Third time’s the charm and this will be the _fourth_.”

He shakes with silent laughter against her thigh. “That’s an interesting argument. But I’m not sure I see any logic in it.”

“Fuck you,” she scowls, unable to provide a smarter response.

“Eventually.”

_Ugh._ She’s so going to deck him once he finally gets her off.

She lets out a frustrated groan, head falling back against the pillow. The ceiling is dull and grey but it's better than looking at Cassian’s smug and annoyingly handsome face.

“But first,” he continues, his voice light with barely concealed humor, and Jyn’s head snaps up, “I’m going to eat you out until you come so hard so many times you’ll forget your own name. _Then,_ you can fuck me. Or I fuck you. Whichever you prefer, yeah?”

And without waiting for an answer, Cassian buries his face in her and makes good on his promise. It is, indeed, rewarding.

**ii.**

“Please,” Jyn gasps, voice laced with laughter, the kind that’s overwhelming and uncontrollable and makes your belly ache.

Cassian is not at all moved by her plea, tickling her sides until she shrieks with laughter again. One hand is holding her wrists above her head, trapping her with his heavy weight over her body as his other hand tortures her mercilessly, but she could always knee him in the groin and flee. She just doesn’t want to escape _that much._

Still, she begs between squeals of laughter. “Cassian, come on, stop, _stop_.”

He lets up a bit, allowing her to catch her breath, but doesn’t release her wrists.

She wiggles in his hold, a half-hearted attempt to break free. Still gasping for air, she tells him, “You’re evil.”

He feigns a pout. It’s kind of adorable but she would never admit that. “But I like to hear you laugh.”

“There are better ways to achieve that,” she tells him sternly. “Besides, this is not laughing, this is screeching.”

“I don’t know.” He trails off, lips slowly curling into a smile. “You don’t seem to mind it that much.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, is me begging you to stop not obvious enough? I’ll make a bigger effort next time.”

His response is to start tickling her again, but gentler this time, merely teasing. She lets out a few huffs of laughter, his name falling from her lips as a warning, yet she can’t hide the affectionate undertone. He smiles at her, so warm and beautiful that everything else around them disappears for a second. War and death and uncertainty forgotten, she feels… happy.

It’s still something she’s getting used to, being so content in his presence. She’s still a little wary, letting her guard down. That’s why Cassian was trying to cheer her up, trying to make her forget that he came back from his last mission bloodied and bruised and staggering. He hadn’t been gravely injured but it was enough to make her pull up some of the walls he’s brought down over the last few months. It was a harsh reminder that even though he was the only one who always came back to her, there might come a day when he would not.

But then he made her laugh like she hasn’t laughed in… well, _ever_ , even if his methods were a little unconventional. And she calmed, enough that the smile on her face now is genuine.

Cassian draws small circles on her stomach, just shy of tickling her again, and she lazily swats his hand away. “Stop,” she repeats, a smile hiding in her voice. _I’m fine now,_ she says without words, her eyes doing all the talking.

And Cassian complies, snuggling next to her on the small bed they’re unofficially sharing, wrapping his arms around her waist. Jyn can breathe easy again.

**iii.**

“Please,” Jyn murmurs, the word barely audible, lost in the shuddering sobs wrecking her body.

Cassian is pale and weak in her arms, blood seeping through the hastily wrapped bandage around his wound. She knows he’s fighting unconsciousness, his eyelids heavy and blinking closed from time to time, but he’s not taken his eyes off her and she hasn’t dared to take hers off him. When she reaches up to stroke his cheek, her fingers leave behind a streak of red, his own blood smeared across his face.

“Please, don’t die,” she gasps, uncaring of how needy she sounds. She feels like she might die too if he does, especially because the bolt was meant for her, and if anyone is supposed to be dying in the other’s arms right now, it’s her.

But he threw himself in front of her, like some self-sacrificing romantic hero of a holodrama that she never wanted him to be, and if he died for this, she would never –

“Jyn,” Cassian rasps weakly and she tries to blink away her tears, if only for his sake. He wants to say something else but he doesn’t seem strong enough to force the words out and she shushes him gently, not wanting him to overexert himself. Besides, it’s very likely that anything he wants to say, she wouldn’t like to hear it right now.

“We’re almost there,” she says, her voice a whisper, hoping that she’s right. Threading her fingers into his hair, her thumb caresses his scalp, her eyes gazing into his. “Just hold on a little longer.”

He’s going to fall unconscious, she can tell. His eyes are fluttering closed more and more often, even as he fights to open them again, and there’s nothing she can do to stop it. The uselessness alone could make her scream.

But he takes a deep breath and opens his mouth and forces out the words he wanted to say anyway; the words that would normally make her smile at him with fondness but now make her blood run cold because it feels like goodbye.

“I’ll always come home to you,” he says, and his eyes slip closed even as she chokes out another broken please. He doesn’t open them again.

“Please,” she repeats, not sure who she’s talking to anymore, just that she needs someone to listen and let her keep him. She searches for a pulse, exhaling in relief when she finds one, faint as it is.

He hasn’t given up yet. She curls her hand around his wrist, holding onto him with all her might, as if she could keep him from death if she just held on tightly enough. He hasn’t given up and she’s not going to let him.

**iv.**

“Please,” Jyn sighs, rubbing her forehead, almost defeated in the face of someone just as stubborn as she is.

Of course, she’s just as stubborn. “She takes after you,” Cassian likes to remind her. “That remains to be seen,” she replies every time, but in this instance, he isn’t really wrong. She’s been sitting here for at least half an hour, trying to make their daughter eat her breakfast to no avail. Today, it seems, she’s decided she doesn’t like apple oatmeal anymore.

“You have to eat this, baby. Come on.” She lifts the spoon towards her, attempting to coax her into eating a little. “For Mamá?” she adds hopefully.

“Mamá,” her daughter echoes eagerly, repeating it several times but still refusing to take a bite.

“Yes, mamá,” Jyn nods patiently. She’s not a very patient person but for her daughter, she would be. “Will you eat this for mamá, hmm? Please?”

“Please! Mamá.” She points at Jyn, then at herself, babbling, “Addie.”

Jyn’s lips automatically curl into a proud smile. “That’s right. Very good. Now will you be a good girl and – ”

“Papá!” Jyn is cut off by her daughter’s excited squeal and she turns around to see Cassian entering the kitchen, a warm smile playing on his lips at the sight of them.

“Hello, querida,” he greets Addie, pressing a kiss to her forehead, then to Jyn’s as well.

“Papá, up!” Addie squirms in her high chair, holding her arms out, waiting to be picked up. Jyn sighs again.

“Not until you eat. Your daughter is being stubborn,” she informs Cassian with a playfully strict look at the two-year-old. “She refuses to eat her breakfast.”

“Is that so?” He looks at Addie for an answer and she vigorously shakes her head, still holding her arms out towards her father.

“No! Up, papá!”

“No, Addie, you have to eat.” He crouches down next to her and taps her nose with a finger, earning a giggle. “Be a good girl and listen your mamá, okay? Will you eat this for her?”

Addie pauses for a second, looks towards Jyn who smiles encouragingly, then nods. “Okay.”

Jyn huffs under her breath. “I was begging her for half an hour and you ask only once…”

But she lifts the spoon again and Addie swallows the bite without protest. Cassian smiles in approval, something that delights Addie and prompts her to ask for another spoonful, ever daddy’s little girl. Jyn can’t really blame her, and only smiles in amusement when Addie demands to be picked up again as soon as her oatmeal is gone. Cassian doesn’t resist this time, willingly lifting her out of the high chair and into his arms. It’s a beautiful sight, and Jyn’s heart swells at the two of them together, a fierce protectiveness taking over her. This is the family she never thought she would get, the one she fought and bled for. 

This is the family they won for.

**Author's Note:**

> ending sentences, as you will eventually find out, are my enemy. I hate them, they hate me.
> 
> the fourth one was a spur of the moment addition because I didn't want to leave this the way the third one ended... but I think it's definitely the weakest.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this and if you want, you can find me on [tumblr.](http://captainandors.tumblr.com/) I'm new to this fandom but I would love to get to know you all!


End file.
